tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74923313562027775682024-03-13T16:56:13.808-04:00TwintrospectivesTwintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.comBlogger74125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-84615066269197239502014-02-19T22:03:00.000-05:002014-02-19T22:04:48.780-05:00Blossoming Blog<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l3k3CpPF7Xg/UwVwFdLDLVI/AAAAAAAAAYI/n5SE4rtU6gM/s1600/Carolyn+with+twins+2013.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l3k3CpPF7Xg/UwVwFdLDLVI/AAAAAAAAAYI/n5SE4rtU6gM/s1600/Carolyn+with+twins+2013.jpg" height="320" width="304" /></a></div>
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I’ve been pretty busy with life and it’s been a while since
my last post. Not that I haven’t been blogging, I have, but for a couple of
other groups I’ve added into my mix. I work full time, parent full time and try
to include my blog and other exciting opportunities in my monthly routine as
best as I can.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Three years ago, when I started this blog, I thought to
myself, I will make something of it. Blogging is hard to keep up and many lose
their momentum. When I started blogging my purpose was to reach other parents
of premature children, as well as multiple-births children. I wanted this blog
to take off and blossom. I was on maternity leave when I started
Twintrospectives and was able to squeeze in lots of blog writing during nap
times. Little did I know how connected I would become to the parents I aimed to
reach, right across the world! Initially I worked hard to participate in blog
hops to share the details of my new blog and it was very exciting to see new
comments and visits to my blog.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In the early days, I didn’t know where this blogging thing
would take me, but I was pretty determined to make something of it. I wasn’t
setting out to monetize my blog (back when I didn’t actually know what
monetizing meant), rather I truly wanted to connect with others or at the very
least share my thoughts and opinions on raising premature babies and hope that
someone would either get a good laugh out of some of my predicaments or
identify with my experiences and feel like they’re not alone.<o:p></o:p></div>
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This blog has given me the confidence to reach out to the
preemie community and connect in ways I never imagined. The conversations that
have stemmed from this blog and Twitter have led to new friendships and
professional connections. I am so grateful for both!<o:p></o:p></div>
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The biggest thing the existence of this blog has taught me
is that if you take the time to say something that matters to you with complete
honesty, people will listen and respond. Doors you didn’t realize existed will
open.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I’d love for you to check out some of the groups and
organizations I am working with now, which has so much to do with having
started this blog 3 years ago.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://cpbf-fbpc.org/" target="_blank">Canadian Premature Babies Foundation</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://multiplebirthscanada.org/index.php/parents/support/preterm-birth-support-network" target="_blank">Multiple Births Canada’s Preterm Birth Support Network</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.preemiebabies101.com/" target="_blank">Hand to Hold’s Preemie Babies 101</a></div>
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<a href="http://hdydi.com/about-how-do-you-do-it/" target="_blank">How Do You Do It? Moms of Multiples Tell it Like it Is</a><o:p></o:p></div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-83950144941622884532013-11-11T19:16:00.001-05:002013-11-11T19:17:08.688-05:00Prematurity Awareness Week 2013<br />
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<span style="color: purple; font-size: large;">This month the United States is celebrating prematurity awareness month. Many are recognizing premature birth all week long leading up to World Prematurity Day on Sunday, November 17.</span><br />
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<span style="color: purple; font-size: large;">All this week, one of the blogs I write for is posting several posts per day to celebrate and recognize the importance of premature birth awareness. Go check out </span><span style="color: purple; font-size: large;"><a href="http://hdydi.com/2013/11/11/hdydi-prematurity-awareness-week-2013/" target="_blank"> How Do You Do It? Prematurity Awareness Week 2013</a> this week to learn about what to expect, learn some of the terminology you might encounter in a neonatal intensive care unit and you can even share your story in comments or by joining in on the blog hop, where you can share your personal blog or preemie story link all week long.</span><br />
<br />Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-54648295169583784732013-10-11T00:15:00.000-04:002013-10-11T00:25:06.564-04:00When Even the Professionals Get it Wrong...Really WrongRecently I had the chance to sit with a group of mothers, who were much like me, having at least twins in their busy families. We listened to a very nice lady, who happened to be a psychotherapist, who also happened to make a terrible and uneducated judgement during her chat.<br />
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While talking about the obvious challenges bringing more than one baby home at a time can bring to a couple, and the ups and downs of making a relationship work, she said she really doesn't know how parents of multiples do it and continue to be able to make time for each other.<br />
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She reminded us that it really is hard work to make a relationship work and that's okay. Nothing worthwhile comes easy...or so the saying goes. She had my attention here. She was giving us mothers permission to be tired and have random, dumb arguments with our husbands over the contents of a recycling bin (yes, I had an argument over a recycling bin!) She said she knows from many conversations that couples with multiples or singletons for that matter, often struggle to find time for each other because if you both work all day or one's at work while the other is caring for the kids all day long, once the kids are tucked in bed, the last thing many parents...in particular mothers...want to think about is how to make the only other grown adult in the house happy. Days are long and can be taxing if you're at work all day or hanging out with screaming, crayon eating, runny nosed children. Once bedtime is dealt with many of us want to sit and enjoy the silence, maybe not chat with anyone at all because you actually lack the energy to do so. Sometimes that happens. We're human.<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5nxmUcmbF4o/Uld3WUJ3YlI/AAAAAAAAAXo/in-yuqkNqXQ/s1600/nanny.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5nxmUcmbF4o/Uld3WUJ3YlI/AAAAAAAAAXo/in-yuqkNqXQ/s320/nanny.png" width="213" /></a>As this psychotherapist went on to discuss how tired we are as parents and had us raising our hands to various questions, she proceeded to ask, "Who here has a nanny?" Two of us raised our hand...one of those people was me. Yes, our household has a nanny. It's not something I openly talk about because lots of people, and I mean lots, make inaccurate assumptions of what having a nanny really means. Since I have a nanny, I am told my husband and I are "rich." I've been told we're "lucky." I've been told, "It must be nice to have an immaculate house to come home to every night after work." My responses are, "No, we're not rich. We can't actually afford to send our kids to an actual daycare because it would cost us close to $3000 a month," and "Why are we lucky? I'm not really sure," and finally, "We have a nanny, not a housekeeper. She looks after 3 young children, not the ring around the bathtub." Having a nanny is about cost-savings and that is it. It doesn't mean I am any less tired at the end of the day. I work a full time job, leaving the house at 8:15 and getting home at 5:30ish. Same for the hubby. We're busy people, working hard to bring home the bacon.<br />
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So when I raised my hand, along with the other woman in the room, the psychotherapist proceeded to tell everyone we (us two idiots who put up our hands) have the best...how can I keep this PG? The best "relationships" with our husbands out of everyone in the room! Why? Because we have a nanny looking after our kids. What?? FYI, a nanny is not an accessory. Having a nanny doesn't mean it makes a workday less challenging. Having a nanny doesn't make our lives any better than the mothers who take their kids to daycare for the day or are stay at home moms, so why is there this apparent mythical labelling that a nanny is the perfect fix to a relationship and whatever other inaccurate labels people bestow upon them? Once this woman said this, she completely lost me. Fizzle...Checked out. It left me feeling like this message coming from the expert, was that if we had a nanny, life must be peachy and I really had nothing to complain about. I must not be like the other mothers in the room. Because I have a nanny.<br />
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So the moral(s) of this story? Skip the assumptions. Do your research before you cast your judgement. And even if you think it's going to be funny, just don't say it if you don't know your audience!<br />
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<br />Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-47511567857574034682013-10-01T00:15:00.000-04:002013-10-01T00:15:00.564-04:00Breastfeeding Buddies: Twin Brothers Nurse while Living in the NICU - Canadian Edition<div style="color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15.454545021057129px; line-height: 21.81818199157715px; margin-bottom: 1.625em;">
<em style="color: inherit; line-height: 1.625;">I originally wrote this post in August on www.hdydi.com for the World Breastfeeding Week 2013 Blog Carnival. I wrote these tips based on my real life experiences of breastfeeding my three little guys during my time in and after their NICU graduations. We aim to promote community support and to normalize breastfeeding for today's and the future's parent. Find more posts that were included by visiting the <a data-mce-href="http://www.nursingfreedom.org/2013/07/wbw-2013-carnival.html" href="http://www.nursingfreedom.org/2013/07/wbw-2013-carnival.html" style="color: #1b8be0; font-style: inherit; line-height: 1.625; text-decoration: none;">main carnival page</a>.</em></div>
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<em style="color: inherit; line-height: 1.625;"><b>This week it is Breastfeeding Awareness Week here in Canada (October 1 - 7.)</b></em></div>
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<span style="line-height: 25px;"><i>A special note I want to make is that although I am pro-BF'ing and I tried very hard to be successful, I do believe each mother has the choice and I hope that mothers will consider and try breastfeeding, and if it doesn't work, seek some help and if still doesn't work, well then, it doesn't work. On another note, many premature babies have difficulty in gaining weight and struggle and in these cases premature babies often benefit greatly from receiving fortified milk or supplemental formula feeds to increase caloric intake. If you are reading this, in a NICU and want to solely breastfeed your babies, but the doctors are advising to fortify, it is important for you to understand the rationale behind it and be on the same page as your baby's specialists.</i></span></div>
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We all hear it. We all know it. “Breast is best.” Being able to breastfeed babies is something to strive for and many new mothers are bound and determined to be successful breastfeeding mommies. But it’s not always that easy.</div>
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What happens when you have more than one baby at a time, each demanding to be fed as newborn babies do? How do you balance the needs of twins, ensuring they are being well-nourished? How do you handle your own needs as a mom, such as getting enough sleep, managing your own diet when you are trying to balance the needs of multiple babies? How do you learn to nurse your babies if they are born premature and are living in a NICU? Each situation is challenging, but each of these needs can be achieved. I am telling you, because I have done it for three premature babies, including twins while in a NICU. I’m not going to lie. It’s not easy. You might shed a few tears. You might want to give up. People might try to talk you out of it. But I’m telling you now, it can be done!</div>
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While in the NICU for over three months with twins, I learned to nurse each of my babies when they were ready. Unfortunately we found ourselves in contact isolation for about 9 weeks of this time, all the while trying to learn to breastfeed and nourish my babies enough to be able to go home when they were ready and continue on with breastfeeding for as long as possible. Wearing gloves and gown while in isolation, I learned to work through the awkwardness of breastfeeding while in my isolation “get-up,” along with dealing with numerous wires and sticky things about my babies’ bodies. It truly was awkward, yet I wasn’t going to give up because of a rash of a bit of bad luck. The one thing that was natural and I could do for my babies, I was going to do.</div>
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Here are my<strong style="color: inherit; font-style: inherit; line-height: 1.625;"> 5 tips</strong> for you to try with the hopes that you will be successful while breastfeeding in a NICU and beyond.</div>
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Why Do You Want to Breastfeed?</h1>
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First things first, ask yourself why you want to breastfeed. Is it for your own personal satisfaction and goal of providing for your children? Is it because you feel it is best for your children? Or is it because someone else told you that you should? If it is because you either want to gain something out of it such as the feeling of satisfaction of knowing you are providing nourishment for your babies or because you feel in your heart it is what needs to be done and you’re going to do it, then you’re on the right track. To be successful at breastfeeding babies, who are living in a NICU, when you are already under an enormous amount of strain and potential mental, physical and emotional stress, you have to be sure breastfeeding is important to you and you’re not doing it because someone else said so. If you are not mentally prepared to breastfeed, you’re headed for a rocky road.</div>
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Communicate Your Breastfeeding Goals to Others</h1>
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Make sure you tell your babies’ NICU nurses, lactation consultant, and medical team your goal to breastfeed your babies when they are ready. Remember, because your babies have arrived early, they may not be able to start nursing immediately due to their size or health situation. Give it time and be patient. Begin using a breast pump as soon as possible and on a regular schedule, which you will expect to follow when the babies are ready to begin breastfeeding. Most hospitals will have you begin to get accustomed to an every three hour pumping and eventually breastfeeding schedule. Now is a great time to allow your body to what it was designed to do, which is produce milk for your newborn babies. If you find you are experiencing challenges with producing, consider being in a NICU a blessing in disguise. If you are struggling in the early days, you will have a bit of time to investigate and figure out how to have your milk come in. By being in the NICU you have access to the nursing team, as well as lactation consultants, which you wouldn’t have if you went directly home after the birth of your babies.</div>
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Use the NICU Resources</h1>
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No one wants to be in the NICU. I know that. The way I looked at it though, is that it was a chance situation that put me in the NICU, surrounded by medical experts and a team of lactation consultants, occupational therapists and dieticians, so I was going to make full use of the medical team there to support me and my babies. Each of these experts has a different way of looking at the breastfeeding process. Your lactation consultant can discuss tips and tricks for positioning yourself and your babies for optimal comfort and breastfeeding success. An occupational therapist can also be brought into the picture to assess how babies are handling the “suck, swallow, breathe” process and make any necessary adjustments needed for your breastfeeding technique. The dietician may discuss your dietary needs, what’s best to eat while breastfeeding, as well as possibly discuss your infants’ dietary needs and possibility of higher caloric intake, which may depend on weight and rate of growth. These people are a quick phone call away and they will come to help you when you ask. Where else can you get a team of experts like this practically at your fingertips?</div>
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Find Your Comfort Zone</h1>
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Each mother is different and thankfully there are different ways to breastfeed your babies. Figure out what works best for you by trying things out. Once again, since you are in the NICU, now is the best time to hammer out the best approach for feeding your babies. Having premature babies often means they are very small in size. It can be very uncomfortable in the early days when it comes to figuring out how to handle their little bodies and having the confidence that you are not actually hurting them as you move them around getting settled to breastfeed. It will take some time to get comfortable with these things. Ask the lactation consultant if they have a variety of nursing pillows for you to try. One mom of multiples might swear by nursing pillows made specifically for twins, while another mother might prefer a different style which fits her small premature babies on it. Some moms are quite content layering a few pillows across their lap and adjusting based on the babies’ needs for positioning. You may find your babies also have a preference for a certain breastfeeding hold over another. Once again, your time in the NICU allows you the unique opportunity for “practice,” as well as bedside coaching from the nurses and other staff involved in your babies’ care.</div>
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Before Discharge from NICU</h1>
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The day you get to take your babies home will eventually arrive. Make sure you plan how you will transition yourselves from the NICU with constant access to experts to your own household, which will not have a 24 hour staff on call. How will you and your partner handle your breastfeeding schedule once you have brought your babies home? Will your partner be able to support your goal of breastfeeding by helping you keep on top of your feeding schedule and by helping you get up in the wee hours of the night to feed them? These are all important points to consider and prepare for before being discharged from the hospital. To help make a smooth transition from NICU to home, consider contacting your local multiples organization to see if they have a breastfeeding support person, or your local public health office and even your children’s pediatrician’s office. All of these organizations will know how to put you in touch with a lactation consultant or formal breastfeeding supports. Knowing that you can build your own “team” outside the hospital will hopefully help you keep on track with breastfeeding your babies until you are ready to wean them, whenever that day may be.</div>
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Landing in a NICU with your premature babies is not ideal, but take it is a chance to accept help you would not have received otherwise. Consider this your opportunity to get breastfeeding right. You are in a place with some amazing experts that you never would have had access to if you’d had your babies and went directly home. The NICU is likely a whole new world to you, so take the time to explore it and the unexpected opportunities it has available to you. I am confident I was able to successfully breastfeed my three children for 13 months and 9 months based on the fact I had supportive experts rooting for me and showing me the way from day one.</div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-7621848150223290592013-09-21T15:01:00.001-04:002013-09-21T20:51:30.094-04:00The Bed Rest I Didn't GetBed rest. It can mean different things to different women. To one woman it could be nothing but a memory of fear and isolation. To another it could be a time she took to deal with the facts of life, take one day at a time and do what she could to get her baby as far along to term as possible. To me it's a time I didn't get and really do wish I had been given the opportunity, but it just didn't work out that way.<br />
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Since I didn't get bed rest while carrying my twins, it really is a whole other world I don't really understand. Much like the NICU is a whole other world that most people I meet have no idea about. Ever.<br />
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In recent weeks I've been chatting to mothers who have been and expectant mothers who are currently on various forms of bed rest, from being at home and taking it easy to being on strict bed rest in the hospital. I have been learning more about this world I know little about. Some things are surprising and some things I really just never thought of before and why would I if I wasn't in the situation, right? But what I do realize because of the type of work I do, is that it is so important to understand as much as possible about the unique experiences of all the mothers I may encounter, work with or befriend. We all have an interesting story to tell, which sometimes has immense challenges and these mothers truly are warriors.<br />
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This week I was asked to review a brand new e-book written by a mother who was on bed rest in hospital, while hoping to hold on to her triplets pregnancy as long as possible. <b><a href="http://www.angelabickford.com/meet-angela/#.Uj3pUcakolQ" target="_blank">Angela Bickford</a></b> has written a book that is a quick, funny and helpful read and kept me engaged even though I was never a bed resting mommy. The book talks about some of the silliest, most bizarre kinds of situations every day women are being plunked into at their doctor's orders, but it also discusses some of the challenges and how partners, friends and families can continue to support a mother on bed rest. I think it's a great read for anyone involved in helping a mom get through the bed rest stage of a pregnancy.<br />
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I found the section in chapter 9 talking about what friends can do for a friend on bed rest really helpful and I'll be sure to remember some of the ideas for expectant parents I may encounter in the future. There are helpful tips and advice for the expectant mom, the father, the friends and family, so I would recommend anyone involved in a bed resting mommy's situation be handed this book to read to quickly be in the know and do what they can to help the expectant mother make it through.<br />
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Angela is a mother to triplets, who lost one and is currently raising the surviving two. She is passionate about telling her story through public speaking, writing in publications, on her own blog and the <i><a href="http://hdydi.com/about-the-authors/" target="_blank">How Do You Do It? Where moms of multiples tell it like it is</a></i> blog. You can find her book, <a href="http://bit.ly/18M4yuC" target="_blank">Beating Bed Rest</a> available to purchase on her website.<br />
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<br />Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-71917929389538483142013-07-31T21:38:00.000-04:002014-03-17T22:31:20.613-04:00Proud Mom of a NICU Grad 2010 X 2<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="text-align: center;">Today, July 31</span><sup style="text-align: center;">st</sup><span style="text-align: center;"> is our 3</span><sup style="text-align: center;">rd</sup><span style="text-align: center;"> NICU Graduation Anniversary day for Twin A! </span>Three years ago we celebrated the discharge of Twin A from
hospital, which was a day we waited a long time for. I’m not going to lie, not all
of those days were filled with patience and understanding. Some of those days
when we were waiting to get to take our babies home were filled with tea<o:p></o:p><br />
rs,
frustration and what sometimes felt like my heart was breaking.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l6-hpnU2Tuo/Ufm3ahoJ8uI/AAAAAAAAAW4/9d9htddS4Q4/s1600/sleepcarebyparent.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l6-hpnU2Tuo/Ufm3ahoJ8uI/AAAAAAAAAW4/9d9htddS4Q4/s200/sleepcarebyparent.JPG" height="150" width="200" /></a> </td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cat nap in the "care by parent" room. <br />
Final stage of NICU!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="text-align: center;">That day was one of the most positive days in three months. As any NICU parent knows, we experience many positive experiences or steps in the right direction during a NICU stay, but that final step of being able to walk your baby out of the NICU, which has protected him since the day he arrived is an amazing feeling! No longer is your baby sheltered inside a dimly lit intensive care unit, with alarms, wires and a staff. Now he is all yours and ready to go home! When we walk out those NICU doors and they close behind us, we get this sudden urge to run for the elevator doors and get out of there as fast as possible before someone changes their mind! Imagine that? Funny, but not! </span><br />
<span style="text-align: center;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vC7SjUXtKYQ/Ufm3Yf-gcQI/AAAAAAAAAWg/QPxNOjiyiO8/s1600/meetbabya.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vC7SjUXtKYQ/Ufm3Yf-gcQI/AAAAAAAAAWg/QPxNOjiyiO8/s200/meetbabya.JPG" height="150" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Big Bro greets Twin A at NICU exit.<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<span style="text-align: left;"></span><br />
<span style="text-align: left;">
</span>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="text-align: left;">
</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
All parents who walk out of a hospital with their
new little baby walk out with pride plastered all over their faces. A NICU
parent does that too, but may have more people to stop and chat with and will
be more than happy to take in all the glory of the ooh’s and ah’s and loving
coo’s coming from staff and random strangers’ mouths, as they make their way
toward the exit to take their small baby home. It’s like a mini, slow-moving
parade. On our special day, as I wheeled out Twin B, who had just officially
met his big brother after 93 long days apart, the sun was shining and my
children’s grandmothers were in tow and they were smiling from ear to ear. It
was one of the best days I had ever experienced, but things weren’t quite right
yet.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While we focused our attention on getting Twin A situated in
his second “home away from home” at the Ronald McDonald House down the street
from the hospital, the reality was Twin B was still in the NICU, as he was
still working on being well enough to come home. My little family was not yet
picture perfect yet.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ll-H5XQ_maY/Ufm3Zev1pPI/AAAAAAAAAWk/jVgxIY8fvGg/s1600/babyastroller.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ll-H5XQ_maY/Ufm3Zev1pPI/AAAAAAAAAWk/jVgxIY8fvGg/s200/babyastroller.JPG" height="150" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Getting used to life "on the outside."</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4jRXqoZL9NM/Ufm3ZVr7BCI/AAAAAAAAAWs/9lHedD-Q66g/s1600/rmhhbabya.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4jRXqoZL9NM/Ufm3ZVr7BCI/AAAAAAAAAWs/9lHedD-Q66g/s200/rmhhbabya.JPG" height="200" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Big Bro gets in his first snuggles <br />
with Twin A.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Now my time was not only going to be divided between the
hospital and my eldest child, it had to be divided between the hospital with
Twin B, Twin A at our “temporary residence” and Big Brother who was bouncing
between our actual home and the “home away from home.” Thankfully, I had two
awesome ladies front and centre to help balance the needs of Twin A and Big
Brother, taking up temporary residence off and on for three more weeks while we
waited for Twin B to join his two NICU Grad brothers with his rite of passage
in graduating from his NICU stay.<o:p></o:p><br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Cbr3Y8p24l8/Ufm4qFgeiVI/AAAAAAAAAXM/WfTy42emCJ0/s1600/catnap.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Cbr3Y8p24l8/Ufm4qFgeiVI/AAAAAAAAAXM/WfTy42emCJ0/s200/catnap.JPG" height="200" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Another cat nap. This time at his <br />
Home Away from Home.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
The boys’ father was at work, making a living and bringing
home the bacon, while I worked hard with my little boys outside the hospital
and my little man working on healing and re-teaching him to breastfeed. He had
had a surgery and was very pooped out, losing his will to breastfeed. Those final
three weeks seemed like an eternity, but I knew we were in the home stretch.
With a lot of collaboration between our NICU team, including the
neonatologists, occupational therapist, lactation consultant, our nurses and
myself, we devised plans, scaled back, re-thought and tried again to get this
little man healthy, packing on the grams (yes, grams) and ready to graduate.
Those days were taxing. They were frustrating. I advocated like I never
advocated for my child before! And it was so worth it. By this stage of the
game I had developed a new found confidence in<br />
my knowledge as a mother and I
had learned how to speak for<br />
my baby and for the wellness of my family.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Three weeks after Twin A came home, along came Twin B, right
behind is little big brother. That day was the end of our NICU chapter and the
start of many amazing new ones in our own home as a family of five.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-73894415920651445672013-05-28T22:11:00.000-04:002013-05-28T22:13:17.064-04:00Are you aware? National Multiple Births Awareness Day<div class="MsoNormal">
Today is our day to celebrate and share the fun and the
freaky when it comes to raising multiples. Of course people are “aware” of
multiples…but are they really <i>aware</i>?
My personal experience after having hundreds of conversations with people who
do not have multiples is that it is safe to say they just really… are not. No
offence to them. It is hard for people to understand and make appropriate conclusions
when they haven’t lived the life or walked two or three miles in a multiple
parent’s shoes.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you’re a multiples parent, how many times have you heard “It’s
no harder than having two single babies”? In my head I may sometimes be
yelling, “Bite your tongue! Bite your tongue!” I usually choose the high road.
Usually. Depending on the situation and who I am talking to I might paint a
picture of the very early days, the NICU stay, the outright crazy fears we
lived with daily for weeks at a time, then the awesome NICU graduation days
that came and of course all the amazing things that have taken place since. I
might be able to sum it up in 15 minutes. Do you have time to spare?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What I do find hard about being a MoM is that sometimes,
without knowing it, people tend to diminish or downplay the experience of
having twins. It can be like a slap across the face. On the average day do I
care if people are aware that I have twins? No. But on those days when I have
two little guys freaking out in a grocery store because I had no choice but to
bring them along and someone says something completely silly at the most
inopportune time or smiles and says “double the trouble”…I wonder what
possesses them to say such an unhelpful or quite obvious thing to a mother who
is obviously struggling, probably mortified and just wants to get out of there
without feeling like a circus show?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is where other parents of multiples come in. They get
it. Definitely. No doubt about it. They know what it’s like to be adamant about
nursing two babies at one time. Yup, us multiples moms do try it…some stick
with it…others make the decision that best suits their family’s needs. And that’s
okay! There is no judgement, just a lot of positive support and advice. Try
this. Do that. This worked for me. Did you hear of this new product for twins? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There is a huge level of camaraderie in the multiples world.
It amazes me! Mothers and Dads (we need more Dads in on this action) across
Canada unite through Multiple Births Canada, local Chapters and other fun,
supportive groups with multiples on the mind. They are communicating on
Facebook groups, Twitter, networks and email, all in order to create
friendships and bonds with other multiples families. We celebrate each other’s
triumphs, like NICU graduations or starting JK, making it through those first
hard years without going bonkers. We lift each other’s spirits when sometimes
life just seems to be too stressful, messy and tiring when it comes to raising
multiples and sometimes more. We take photos of awesome double and triple
strollers we find in consignment shops and garage sales, uploading them ASAP to
our social networks. “Check this out twin moms! Hurry before this awesome
stroller is gone.” We stand in grocery store aisles and message our social
networks, knowing that at any given moment someone will be there and can look
up a recipe for you because you actually forgot your grocery list at home. We
send out mass emails to let our MoM friends know where the best deal on diapers
is for that week. I had a singleton and I can reflect on that experience and
confidently say there just wasn’t the same type of support going on between “singleton”
moms (maybe that’s just me.)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So today I thank all the multiples parents I’ve met, who
have supported me along the way, had a laugh with me and shared a hug when I
needed it. You are an awesome bunch of people to have something in common with
and I’m grateful to be part of such an inspiring “club.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #660000; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Happy National Multiple Births Awareness Day! </span><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-50288691507108857152013-05-15T00:00:00.000-04:002013-05-15T00:00:06.249-04:00Cuddle Time: Kangaroo Care and Your Preemie<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Today is International Kangaroo Care Awareness Day. Honestly
it seems to be each week there is something to bring to the forefront of
peoples’ minds when it comes to the world of prematurity and to be quite
honest, I think that’s perfectly okay! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Last week I got the amazing opportunity to speak on a local
radio station during a radiothon for a local child development centre and I
discussed how the parents of preterm infants really end up thinking about all
the smallest, finest details of how to parent and care for their small, fragile babies. From the moment they are born we are on alert and want to
protect and do anything we can to keep our babies from harm, as well as do
anything we can to help them grow and progress in order to go home.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is where Kangaroo Care comes in. Kangaroo Care is not a
new concept, but it has been growing in practice in North American neonatal
intensive care units. As the years go by there is more research indicating the
close skin-to-skin touch between a mother and baby or father and baby really does
wonders for the well-being of the preterm or NICU baby, as well as for the
mental health of the parents. When babies are held in kangaroo fashion, which
is usually just in a diaper and held snuggly against the parent’s bare chest the
babies are found to have more regular breathing (less apnea) and heart beat (less
bradycardias) patterns and therefore less desats(low blood oxygen) episodes. It
seems that this close contact with the parent stimulates the baby’s body and
neurological system, making it seem as though the baby is protected as it would
have been had the baby still been in utero. This is one mom with three preemies’ thought
anyway. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I recall the first time I got to “officially” hold my baby
as though it was yesterday. It was actually 5 years ago, but I remember the
setting, the sounds, the whole surreal feeling I was having in this place we
were suddenly calling home; The NICU. In that dimly lit, private room I was
finally able to hold my baby and get to know him, while reclining in a chair
and holding my baby snug as a kangaroo (a bug?), close to my skin and tucked in
for a nap for the first time. He was 5 days old, but finally Mommy and Baby were
together as we were meant to be. I ended up snuggling with him for close to an
hour that first time. My husband was giddy with excitement to finally get to
hold him like this when the next turn came around. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Kangaroo Care experience was peaceful. When we were
sitting like that in the early days, getting to know our baby, that is when we
were able to accomplish much of our much needed bonding that had to be put on
hold for a few days anyway.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6IFicsjhpZI/UZLoaBAy1fI/AAAAAAAAAV8/UXU8QuaLIVY/s1600/KangarooCare.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="195" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6IFicsjhpZI/UZLoaBAy1fI/AAAAAAAAAV8/UXU8QuaLIVY/s320/KangarooCare.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Two years later we were well-versed on the value of Kangaroo
Care and you didn’t have to tell me twice that it was time to begin Kangaroo
Care with the twins when they were finally healthy enough. I mentioned how
great Kangaroo Care is for the mental health, but it is also helps parents
release the tension they may be holding in their bodies. I remember walking
around feeling tense; this tension in my chest (real or imagined, whatever) and
as soon as I was holding each baby closely I could truly feel that tension
release.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So if you find yourself in a NICU and questioning the point
of doing Kangaroo Care or if you feel shy or embarrassed for whatever reason, I
suggest giving it a go anyway. Talk to your baby’s nurse about wanting to do
Kangaroo Care and to discuss when the time is right. Then when it's time, pull that curtain
closed, have your own comfortable button up shirt (that you’ll wear backward) ready
and waiting, which you’ll use to wrap the baby in, rather than a hospital gown.
It’s worth a shot and you might be surprised how relieved you feel and you’ll
see your baby respond practically immediately. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><b>A couple of special notes to be aware of:</b> Sometimes babies
will need additional time to mature and be well enough to take out of the
incubator to do Kangaroo Care. Be patient and don’t give up during that waiting
process. The opportunity to bond with your baby in this way is not one that
should be dismissed. To put it in perspective: I didn't get to hold Preemie 1 until 5 days old, Preemie 2 until 14 days old (hey, today is that anniversary--3 years ago!) and Preemie 3 really had me in a holding pattern, because I didn't get to hold him until he was 24 days old! The waiting periods were worth it! The first time I held each of my babies it was for formal Kangaroo Care.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Nowadays you can buy a snug wrap, which was purposely designed
for Kangaroo Care. I didn't have that option at the time and I used a backward
hospital gown or my own button up shirts worn backward and they did the trick.
Once your baby is tucked in, you can also ask a nurse to tuck a blanket over
you and your baby for additional warmth if needed. To avoid "boredom" while doing Kangaroo Care, bring a book to read.</i><o:p></o:p></div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-52706978216461827552013-04-10T21:13:00.004-04:002013-04-10T21:14:31.133-04:00Most PopularPeople often ask me what are some of the most popular topics people check out on this blog. So here are the two most popular. The picture of my twins' diapers, size by size, gets me every time!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://twintrospectives.blogspot.ca/2011/11/diaper-backward-spells-repaid.html" target="_blank">Diaper Backward Spells Repaid</a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://twintrospectives.blogspot.ca/2011/07/discharge-spectacular-word.html" target="_blank">"Discharge" -- A spectacular word!</a><br />
<br />
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I'll follow up with more popular posts in the coming weeks.Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-60784062277602920932013-04-09T20:32:00.001-04:002013-04-10T21:16:24.625-04:00I'm a Home Run Hitter<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">I’m a
homerun hitter in this game called Parenting. That’s right. Some days I
practically “hit the ball out of the park” with my parenting skills…but (of
course there’s a but) then there are other days…those bleak days…where it’s three
strikes and I’m out and I haven’t even finished my morning cup of cold coffee
yet.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">Last week I took
part in a workshop, put on by a local social service agency in partnership with
the POMBA I am part of. The workshop was on Positive Parenting and Raising Responsible
Children (us multiples moms and dads need all the advice we can get!) The
facilitator used a baseball analogy in her explanation of positive parenting,
which I will explain shortly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">We all want
to raise awesome children and give them all we can to achieve success…but we
learned maybe that is not exactly the right approach. We need to let children
make mistakes, as painful as it may be to watch happen. We need to let them
learn from their experiences, not clear the path or fight their battles for
them, while thinking we are doing them a favour. We talked about the importance
of give and take when it comes to the parent and child relationship. We heard
about the reasons why children may seem to be “misbehaving,” when perhaps in
fact they are having a hard time verbalizing or expressing what it is that’s
actually making them react in ways we consider “bad.” We also learned from
other parents’ reactions we are not alone when we wonder where the heck The
Parenting Manual is and why didn’t we get training before we had multiples
running around the neighbourhood when the lights are out and all the other kids
are home in their beds?? Okay, that’s a slight exaggeration, but only slight.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">The
facilitator of this workshop discussed the importance of understanding the
difference between praise and encouragement. Another key thought was to
consider the difference between punishment and discipline. At first glance I am sure many parents,
including myself might think these words are one in the same, just a different
way to state them…but with further explanation many of us had our “a-ha
moments” going off one by one through the session.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">For starters
the facilitator explained a concept called STEP – Systematic Training for
Effective Parenting. The main point that drove it home (like a homerun) for me
was praise is used to reward only for well-done, completed tasks. From this the
child begins to develop the ideal that “to be worthwhile I must meet your
standards,” allowing the child to develop unrealistic standards and measure
worth by how closely the child reaches the parents’ perceived level of
perfection. From here children learn to dread failure. On the flip side, in
comparison, encouragement is when a child is recognized for effort and
improvement. The child internalizes the idea that he or she does not have to be
perfect and that efforts and improvements are valued and important. Based on
this type of repetitive experience the child learns to accept his/her and
others’ efforts. It also enables a child to learn discipline and persistence to
stay on task.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">Bringing up
the rear were the concepts of punishment versus discipline. I thought, Aren’t
they the same?…one just seems to have a meaner tone? I looked it up, because
that’s what I do, and yes, they do have similar meanings…but “discipline” is
also defined as activities, exercises or a regimen that develops or improves a
skill; training. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">During the
workshop, “punishment” was outlined as our belief that we must teach a life
lesson and that a punishment, such as taking something away will make the child
think before acting next time or “suffer the consequences.” You may randomly
take something away, that has nothing to do with the problem or situation and
will make no sense to the upset child. That sounds scary and frustrating…Then
on the other hand is the concept of discipline, which is to train the child by
working with him/her to develop effective strategies for expressing their
emotions and managing behaviour to avoid grocery store mid-aisle meltdowns for
all to see (and judge.) </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">To discipline, you have to work at achieving your own
skill of understanding a child’s reasons for behaviour and misbehaviour, use
firmness and kindness in your approach, look for solutions and alternatives. The ultimate goal is to teach the child self-discipline. In other words don’t
start screaming and yelling, thinking you’re going to help the already
frustrating situation. In this sense you’re really reverting to child-like
mannerisms because you can’t get your point across. I get it…but it’s going to
take a lot of practice to make it right…and ultimately this whole concept of
parenting indicates we should not strive for “perfection,” but rather a balance
of confidence in our abilities and a willingness to persevere and try again next
time. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="line-height: 115%;">To close,
the way the facilitator of the workshop summed up these ideas is that when you
start to learn to play baseball, you don’t immediately know how to swing and
hit a ball, or pitch and throw a strike. This was my a-ha moment, after playing
many, many summer baseball seasons over the years, I knew what she meant. I
realized this idea of baseball is similar to learning to parent; these are all
things that take time, dedication and potentially many mistakes along the way
to become as good a parent as you can be. Rarely does a pitcher ever throw a
perfect game and so it’s reasonable to think parents will make mistakes, feel
like they should be thrown out of the Parenting game and maybe even take
themselves out of the game for a few minutes to collect themselves and then
start again with a fresh approach.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;">This post can also be found on another blog site, <a href="http://www.hdydi.com/" target="_blank">How Do You Do It?</a>, <i>where moms of multiples tell it like it is</i>. It is a network and collection of blog posts written by other multiple moms living in Canada and the United States. Stop by and have a look inside the minds of many other parents of multiples. We may have had two or more babies at one time, but so much of the parenting experiences are the same as every other parent, so it's well worth a visit. Happy reading!</span></div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-45011897977182816882013-03-10T20:37:00.001-04:002013-03-10T20:42:43.789-04:00I Survived an Earthquake! Parents of Preemies Day 2013.One June afternoon the earth moved, the ground shook and the
building I sat in swayed. For several moments I thought I was losing my mind, and
then I thought I must be having a stroke, and then the shaking stopped almost
as sudden as it began. I slowly crept out of my room and looked in the hall. No
one was there. I was alone. I walked down the stairs for fear of becoming
trapped in the elevator if the shaking started again. I wasn’t sure I had it
right…had I just sat through an earthquake…or was I really losing my marbles? Everything
seemed pretty usual down on the main floor of the building I was living.
Nothing was tipped over or broken, but then I began to come across a few people
here and there who had experienced what I had. I was not alone. Others in the
building had absolutely no clue what I was talking about and didn’t understand
what I or some of the others had felt. Those of us who did experience this
unusual moment immediately began to recount our experiences and compared our
stories. We wanted others to know what we had actually just lived through.<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-C-wrnJhZhIY/UT0m0lpyRyI/AAAAAAAAAVM/57njNpPwF6I/s1600/PPD-logo-squared-fb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-C-wrnJhZhIY/UT0m0lpyRyI/AAAAAAAAAVM/57njNpPwF6I/s200/PPD-logo-squared-fb.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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Does this sound familiar? It’s comparable to the rocky
experience we preemie parents go through when our babies show up too soon and then afterward when we want to share our experience with the world. When
my premature babies came along, I wondered, How could this actually be
happening?…then Why did this happen to our babies…and there were days I
wondered, Did this really just happen? Is this my reality? I found it hard to
connect with other parents in the NICU because many of them, through no fault
of their own, were not able to stay close by and so their babies were there
with the nursing staff, while I was there pretty much every day chatting with
our nurses, hanging out in quiet areas of the hospital and willing my babies to
get better and be well enough to come home. I did find some great friends in
the NICU— two other preemie mommies—whose babies were going through very
similar struggles as our twins. The
three of us mothers were also there longer than many who came after us and left
before us, so we shared that common bond as well. We “got” each others’ emotions;
we could read each others’ faces…and minds. We knew each other’s deepest fears,
without having to say a word. We were a mini support network without a label.</div>
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Eventually the three of our families made our way out of the
NICU, each of us having experienced very trying times, although the reasons and
exact experiences that led us to the NICU were very different. The main bond
was the experience in the NICU—the emotions, the fears and finally the
triumphs. I am glad to be able to call these two awesome moms my friends. </div>
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Little did I know that day of the earthquake, June 23, 2010,
which was almost two months into our twins’ NICU stay that I would be writing
about it to compare the experience to the life changing experience of a NICU
stay. I also didn’t know how much opportunity would arise after we came home
from the NICU. I write this blog not only for parents of preemies and
multiples, but for others who are curious or just want to know more about how
to help families with premature children and how to identify with their unique
needs. After having 3 preemie kids my
life was forever changed and I wanted to help parents going through the same
preterm birth experience. The most common thing I hear from other parents of
preemie babies is they compare it to a rollercoaster or some kind of a natural
disaster—a tornado, a tsunami…an earthquake. It’s a life altering experience that
can include the scariest moments of a person’s life. Ever.</div>
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Today is the 2<sup>nd</sup> Annual Parents of Preemies Day
and I am happy to wish all my preemie parent friends a wonderful day and a
virtual high five for kicking adversity in the butt and fighting through it all
in the name of your babies. It’s a huge challenge, which in my case has been
the greatest challenge of my life! Parents of preemies deserve a pat on the
back and congratulations for making it through and for building a support
network around themselves for when the going gets tough even after leaving the
NICU because discharging a baby home doesn’t always mean parents have a
well-baby at home. </div>
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So, to all the Parents of Preemies, I wish you much happiness
today and for the future of your amazing families. </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Happy Parents of Preemies
Day 2013!</span></div>
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Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-1069597421853029642013-03-01T22:06:00.001-05:002013-03-02T09:40:18.347-05:00Twintrospectives is 2 Years Old! I'm two years into writing my blog and I can hardly believe how quickly the time has flown by, as well as how fast my little preemie guys have been growing right in front of me! <br />
<br />
When I started this blog my main goal was to be able to think out loud (or in text) and share my thoughts and opinions, trials and tribulations of raising three busy little boys, as well as the ups and downs of raising preterm babies. I think it is safe to say I achieved this basic goal. I have reached people all over the world; Japan, Ukraine, Germany, Philippines, Ireland, Australia, Belarus, Russia, Canada, USA and so many more. It amazes me every day to see how many people are dealing with raising twins, preterm kids or are just interested in learning more about this amazing and inspiring world of prematurity.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-JwxjClk1VoE/UTFsMG5AvkI/AAAAAAAAAU0/WCag3LhJXzs/s1600/globe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-JwxjClk1VoE/UTFsMG5AvkI/AAAAAAAAAU0/WCag3LhJXzs/s200/globe.jpg" width="146" /></a>When I started blogging what I didn't realize was how many people I would reach, how many new friendships I'd make and collaborations that would come from them and all in the name of prematurity awareness. It's awesome and I love this online, world-wide community I have found. <br />
<br />
Taking my blog details to blog hops and onto Twitter has been so much fun and they've taught me so much about other parents and their experiences raising multiples, their prematurity experiences, parenting issues, questions and concerns, as well as the true camaraderie you can find by sharing these experiences.<br />
<br />
Here's a little rundown of my first 2 years in the blog world: <br />
<br />
In the summer of 2011 I wrote the first Parent Perspective blog post for Peek-a-boo ICU's blog, thanks to one awesome NICU nurse, Jodi, who gave me this opportunity. The topic I wrote about was pseudomonas aeruginosa. She also hosted my blog on her preemie parents blog roll for quite some time. I'm very grateful to her for the opportunity! Jodi also included my 3 precious preemies in her first photo compilation video, released around Mother's Day 2011. Here it is on the Peek-a-boo ICU YouTube Channel <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wbr-X75iqOA">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wbr-X75iqOA</a>. My little guys are seen in the hospital, as well as you'll see them in Future Heartbreakers red shirts, and again in blue bunny ears. <br />
<br />
In October 2011 I was honoured to receive an online "award" called the Liebster Award from a woman by the name of Sharon in the NYC area. Sharon is a journalist and writes her own blog http://mamadoitall.blogspot.com. Right around the same time a "Blog on Fire" award came along. Although these are not tangible awards to put up on my mantle, they are very meaningful in that there are people out there taking the time to read certain blogs and letting fellow bloggers know, "Hey, you're doing a great job. Keep going!" I think the fact blog readers go out of their way to tell other bloggers they're doing well is such a great testament to what the blogging world is all about. I'm very thankful for it.<br />
<br />
Through Twitter and information sharing on prematurity and NICU support groups, Facebook pages and commentary on websites and blogs, I have connected with some pretty amazing multiple and preterm parents. I learned of The Painted Diaper, which popped up not long after the earthquake occurred in Haiti in 2010. This was another preemie mommy, determined to assist with the purchase and placement of a warming bed for preterm infants in Haiti. I also found a home on her blog roll. <a href="http://www.thepainteddiaper.com/">http://www.thepainteddiaper.com/</a><br />
<br />
One thing I know about being a mom of preterm kids is this immediate urge to help others get through the stress and trauma of dealing with preterm infants in the NICU, as well as the aftercare experience - from how to get comfortable with feeding your baby through a tube at home without nurses around to dealing with all kinds of therapies and learning how to answer crazy questions coming from complete strangers.<br />
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In 2012 I found new connections with Multiple Births Canada and currently have an opinion blog post listed on their Media Inquiries page in relation to the EI Parental Leave for Multiple Births Families (in Canada) <a href="http://multiplebirthscanada.org/index.php/about-us/media-inquiries/">http://multiplebirthscanada.org/index.php/about-us/media-inquiries/</a><br />
<br />
Most recently I blogged for the Canadian NICU Support Foundation on the topic of making it through the NICU with twins. http://cnsfoundation.blogspot.ca/<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-6AG-KZ5gEFM/UTFqfXWXJRI/AAAAAAAAAUg/06dj6DqB6N8/s1600/cartersoshkosh.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-6AG-KZ5gEFM/UTFqfXWXJRI/AAAAAAAAAUg/06dj6DqB6N8/s200/cartersoshkosh.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="200" /></a></div>
My blog hasn't been about making money or promoting products. That's not to say I wouldn't consider this if it was the right kind of product or idea, so I am definitely open to it. I did join Mom Central Canada as a blogger member quite some time ago and in February an invite came around that made sense for me to attend. I was able to head to the Eaton Centre in Toronto to attend Sears' Carter's Osk Kosh Launch Media Event, which several other "mommy bloggers" were invited to. There were about 20 of us there to meet the executive team that brought the line to Sears Canada. Carter's and Osk Kosh are actually my go-to brands of children's clothing because of their fun lines that come out each season and their durability, so I couldn't pass up this opportunity to meet other moms and of course...Shop!! I got to take some photos, make some new connections and share some fun new clothes with my kids when I got home that day. Here's the Carter's Osh Kosh line at Sears <a href="http://www.sears.ca/catalog/oshkosh-bgosh/100000776">http://www.sears.ca/catalog/oshkosh-bgosh/100000776</a><br />
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cXHIYBbEtjM/UTFrS7jEEbI/AAAAAAAAAUs/TONXMyrhWSo/s1600/bottlesandcarters.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="192" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cXHIYBbEtjM/UTFrS7jEEbI/AAAAAAAAAUs/TONXMyrhWSo/s320/bottlesandcarters.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
<br />
And finally, because I am not already busy enough blogging for myself, my place of employment and other opportunities that I can get my hands on...I've started writing over at How Do You Do It? since this is a question I am asked on a daily basis by those who know me and complete strangers. http://www.hdydi.com/<br />
<br />
I'm looking forward to many more years to come on Twintrospectives and I'm already planning some ideas for 2013. This month I will do a rundown of some of the more popular posts and add to or reflect on some of the ideas in them as well.<br />
<br />
Thank you for reading and sending your friends and family my way.<br />
<br />
Twintrospectives<br />
<br />Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-32920106481012812032013-02-06T22:22:00.000-05:002013-02-09T10:14:29.615-05:00Half the cost?<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So last week I was driving into an underground parking lot and didn’t see the overhanging sign must have come loose and was left hanging on an odd angle after a brutal wind storm we had last week. Only when I heard the terrifying screech of metal on metal, did I realize what had happened. It was a fluke and it was all about timing as I drove under the sign and heard that grinding noise kick in. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It pretty much peeled back a chunk of the metal on my roof, much like a can opener on a tin can. It was a pretty unusual experience and I was shocked it was even possible to happen to me or anybody. It was just a matter of chance. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I didn’t have time for a random accident like this, let alone time to call in an insurance claim, but you gotta do what you gotta do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I called it in and they told me to take it to a specific auto repair shop on their list of recommended places. So in I went the very next day. Considering it’s been -17 degrees Celsius more often than not for the past two weeks, I figure this unwanted moon roof that doesn’t actually close is top priority and since it’s covered by insurance I’ll get it handled A.S.A.P.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So I dropped off my car so the auto repair shop could take a look at the damage and waited for a phone call at work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They did call me toward the end of the day and told me the “damage.” They said my situation is kind of unusual because of where the metal sign started to tear up my car. On closer examination they noticed the metal landed along the windshield seal and damaged that, as well as chipping the top edge of my windshield glass, dragging along the roof and cutting that up. So I knew about the ruined roof, but to be told it also seriously damaged my windshield was a major double whammy. I have a deductible, but I expected my insurance provider would pay the remainder of the cost. No. My insurance company decided the quote to fix the damage was too high and wanted me to take the car to another recommended auto repair shop. Seriously? I’m a busy person.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">But off I went to the next best place, according to the insurance company. They too quoted about the same cost to repair the damage.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Do you know what the insurance company told me…the insurance company I’ve been paying thousands of dollars to without a prior claim? They told me they can only cover the cost involved for one issue, not two issues. So I can either have the damaged window fixed to avoid leaks and long term damage or I can decide to fix the gaping hole in my roof. They told me I can choose to cover the remainder (not including the deductible I will also have to pay.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">How silly is that? It’s just not right, right?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So this leads me to fess up and tell you this story is not true, but I hope it makes a point...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The point being that for those of us who pay into Employment Insurance, often for many, many years without ever accessing it (thankfully), and for those of us who happen to become pregnant with twins, it would be reasonable to anticipate an extra boost of support to cover the costs and needs of two babies while a parent or both parents take a Parental Leave. Newborns do much of their development in their first year of life. This is the optimal time for parents to develop confidence in their ability to raise multiples, which is doubly harder to do when one parent is not there or has to go back to work more quickly than he or she had hoped. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Currently there is question as to why parents of multiples should have their Employment Insurance time away from work (Parental Leave) increased to compensate for the birth of more than one child at the same time. My answer is because it only makes sense. Would you want to drive around with a half fixed car because the insurance provider you paid into for years and years tells you they will only pay for half the costs? Driving around in a car with a chunk of its roof missing would be cold, uncomfortable, stressful, not to mention frustrating. Imagine how it can feel for parents who want to do nothing more than give their newborn twins equal attention, which they do deserve from day one, but instead one parent will have to separate themselves from these young babies two or three weeks after they come home? This scenario usually leaves mom to fend for these new little bundles of joy for long periods of time alone. It can be exhausting, stressful, uncomfortable and outright mentally and emotionally draining dividing your attention between two dependent babies.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What those who contest Bill C-464 may be overlooking is that those who pay into and qualify for Employment Insurance for parental benefit are receiving insurance monies, not tax payers’ dollars. There is a difference. They are two different things…just like twins.</span></div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-12659925467076614102013-01-24T22:30:00.001-05:002013-02-04T21:25:53.579-05:00The Great Canadian Twins Debate...<br />
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">As teenagers, my friends and I would
imagine having kids one day. We’d talk about what we might name them. We’d
wonder if they’d be future NHLers or little ballerinas and even considered the
thought of having twins and what that would mean. Out of my group of friends I
really wanted twins. Seriously. I hoped for twins. Who does that? I do! My goal
was to have twins “on the first try” and I held on to that ideal right until my
first boy was on the way—a singleton. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Back in the day, when we’d discuss my
fascination with twins, my one good friend would recoil at the very sound of
the word “twins” whenever I mentioned the prospect of having two babies at once.
“Why would you want to do that??” she’d exclaim. “Well…why would I not want
to??” Even at the tender age of 16, this friend, who is still my friend today, was
thinking about the financial ramifications of having two babies at one time. No
joke. She realized the costs involved with diapering two babies, feeding two
babies, of losing sleep because each baby was likely to sleep on slightly
different, if not completely different patterns. She knew being a mother to two
babies at the same time would be exhausting and frankly, you’d have no life for
a while. She was also fully aware that there was no consideration for the fact
that there were two babies arriving at the same time and that the parents would
be awarded a single maternity/parental benefit (if the parent had actually
acquired enough insurable hours before the babies arrived.) This was my friend’s
biggest bone of contention when it came to our twins discussions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">And you know what? My friend, that 16
year old was right! At that time in the mid-90s, a mother could get about 15
weeks maternity leave and 10 weeks parental leave. This was for one pregnancy,
regardless of the number of babies that were born from that pregnancy. Same
standard as it is today, except the number of weeks has increased.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I, for one, am definitely grateful to
live in a country in which we do have the opportunity to receive employment
insurance based on becoming a mother. I know this is an “opportunity” or a “privilege”
and not an absolute. If you have not been employed for enough hours leading up
to the time of the arrival of a baby (babies in some of our cases,) well then,
you don’t qualify. Makes sense. I know we are ahead of the game in comparison
to many countries, but at the same time there are other countries out there
that have even greater benefits to parents.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Our Employment Insurance system is in the midst of a
major transition. Many people are worried and unsure at this moment in time
about what the changes mean to the average working Canadian when it comes to
potential job loss. So perhaps the recent events of a Canadian couple
attempting to change the rules surrounding maternity/parental leave are falling
on deaf ears (and unaware minds.) The basic story making headlines today is, back
in April 2009, when a couple’s twins arrived, Christian Martin and his wife, Paula Critchley, had each applied to Service Canada to take the full parental allowance of 35 weeks <a href="http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/ottawa/story/2013/01/24/ottawa-maternity-leave-twins-parents-federal-court-of-appeal.html" target="_blank">(CBC story 2013/01/24)</a>. </span><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">Originally Martin and Critchely were each
approved for a 35 week parental benefit by a Board of Referees, but then the
benefit was retracted by an Umpire who cried foul. What are these kids? Pucks
and Baseballs? </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">For the past couple of years Martin
and Critchley have been drawing attention to their Appeal. The feeling is that
if a pregnancy results in twins, then why shouldn’t that mother and/or father
receive double the benefit to be with their twins for an extended period of
time? This makes sense to me. BUT I can see how it would be alarming and seem unrealistic
to the average person who does not have twins, triplets, quadruplets…and yes,
even octuplets. Today I’ve been reading enormous amounts of backlash and snide
remarks, coming primarily from individuals who do not have multiples, based on
how they describe their family make up. Once again, the argument comes back to
the old saying, “Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in his
shoes.” Please and thank you!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Although I do think it would be
amazing to be able to have a husband or partner take off 35 weeks of work simultaneously
with the mother to care for their infant twins, I can see how that can raise
big question marks in peoples’ minds. If parents of twins get 35 weeks each,
then do parents of triplets get 70 weeks each and so on? Well of course not.
Evidently, there needs to be a new approach to the fact more people are having
multiples (twins are still much more common than triplets or quadruplets,)
regardless of how the pregnancy came to be (I.e.: assisted vs. au natural.) I
think that it would be reasonable to have a happy medium, so that parents who
do conceive and bring into the world some multiples can have extra time to
spend with extra offspring. It seems reasonable!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Going back to my friend’s philosophy…having
twins doesn’t add up. Doesn’t help the bank. Doesn’t help the sanity. So true…and
so…if parents of multiples were able to benefit from even a slight increase in
the number of weeks able to spend with their young babies, such families would fair
better for the long term. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">So to respond to the nay-sayers now…who
are probably huffing and puffing at this thought of an increase in benefit
weeks…Did you know families of multiples suffer greater rates of divorce? Did
you know mothers of twins are more likely to suffer greater levels of Post-Partum
Mood Disorder and Post-Partum Depression than those who have singletons? Did
you know both parents can suffer from such depression before and after (for
many years) due to the experiences involved with bringing multiples into a
family unit? Did you know more multiples
are born pre-term than their singleton counterparts? Did you know this
experience can also add to the strain, physical and emotional well-being of the
parents and other family members, as well as the infants living in the NICUs?
Did you know that parents can suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder due to
the preterm arrival of their multiples? Did you know that many twins born pre-term
also go on to live with chronic and potentially debilitating health issues,
which the parents must learn to manage on a day to day basis? Such parents must
learn CPR before their pre-term infants can leave the hospital. Such parents may
have to equip their home with medical technology, not to mention the doubles of
cribs, bassinets, bottles and diapers. Having twins (multiples) is not a walk
in the park like many parents are indicating all across the web today.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">An unaware person’s rebuttal to the
above may be something like, “I have two kids and I’m just fine.” Yes, yes, you
do. But, you didn’t have two kids born at the same time, with two different
personalities, maybe a few special needs thrown in there, both having to be
attended to at the exact same time with breastfeeding or bottling, bum changes,
learning to use a spoon at the same time and so on. Usually it’s mom who is
doing about 95% (that’s my guesstimate) of this work during the day. Alone. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Imagine
if the mom and dad could take the time off at the same time or dad follows up
after mom is ready to go back to work when her parental leave time ends? The
children would have more time dedicated to them for a longer period of time,
since honestly, when it comes to twins (or more) the attention given to them must
be divided from day one. There is no choice in the matter. They don’t have it
quite as nice as that singleton. I know, so I can say this. I had a singleton
first. I had a singleton when I didn’t know he was a “singleton.” He was also a
preemie, I might add. The concept of singleton vs. multiple really and truly
had no solid meaning in my mind until my multiples arrived. When they arrived I
had that “A-ha! Moment.” This is the difference! I really don’t sleep! I
thought I had it hard when I had baby number one and felt sleep deprived. For
the first several months after the twins came home, I really, really did not
sleep. I also took my twins to 298 specialist appointments in the first 11
months after they were discharged from their 3+ months’ NICU stay. My husband
was at work, so he couldn’t help dress the kids, help me pack up two infants in
their car seat carriers and get their older brother into his back row car seat
to get on our merry way for another run to the hospital. And these nay-sayers
say having twins is no different than having one at a time. Yeah, right. There
are many other issues I could bring up here and point out to the unenlightened,
but we multiples parents know what is accurate and what is not. The goal now is to assist the Martin/Critchley family with building a better, stronger,
undeniable case for when they approach the Supreme Court.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-43280054586218217312012-12-31T23:05:00.000-05:002013-01-04T21:37:44.536-05:00Goodbye 2012I held off posting during the month of December. The month of December has always been important to me. Afterall, Christmas is my favourite holiday of the year. Aside from the 1st Christmases of my three preemies, this Christmas has been one of the greatest times for reflection and thankfulness I can recall. Going into my oldest son's afternoon Christmas concert only minutes after hearing of the unthinkable act that took place in CT was like a slap in the face and yet another dose of reality that a child's life is so precious and you never know when the unexpected will happen. I think we all know how much I appreciate my children, but if it's even possible, that event made me appreciate them even more. Initially I wanted to get to my blog and write a rant about the entire situation, but I figured the media was doing a good job of it on their own. They're the professionals. I avoided my blog and my desire to rant and I was able to put my focus on something else--the things that really matter--my kids. So December was filled with even more time focused on kids, snuggles, playtime, craft time and hanging out. It was a wonderful month with my family, especially the over the holidays.<br />
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During the month of December my youngest son (Twin B) and I could be found in our region's McDonald's Restaurants on the serving tray sheets. Of all places I thought my face might show up, it never occured to me that it would be on the trays people eat food off of. Why would our picture be on such a strange thing? Well, we were able to help the Ronald McDonald House Hamilton with their fundraising again and it was a great experience. A lovely photo of me and my son was found on the sheet, along with one of my many thoughts about how much the Ronald McDonald House offers families with sick children in the hospital...The timing of this photo and quote is bittersweet. <br />
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The quote goes like this...<br />
"<em>When I pictured having babies, the picture never included medical interventions and long term hospital stay, beeping alarms, hospital gowns and gloves. When the unthinkable happened, and my babies had to stay at McMaster Children's Hospital 50 km from my home, the one ray of light was Ronald McDonald House Hamilton. At RMHH my husband and I found a comfortable place to call our "home away from home" so we could be at our babies' bedsides at all times of the day and night. RMHH allowed us to provide our babies with the type of care that only a parent can</em>."<br />
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As much as our children have changed our lives, the RMHH and hospital did too...<br />
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And the photo looked like this...<br />
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Overall, the year 2012 was very productive for my family, including me. We were introduced to the world of Junior Kindergarten. Our twins continue to develop and catch up to their peers. They are turning into such spunky, funny little men--all three of them. I completed 3 months of training to become a certified Peer Health Worker for my region's Public Health unit and I will be carrying out this role in my local Parents of Multiple Births Association, which goes into effect tomorrow, January 1, 2013. I look forward to this role, as I'll be able to connect with and provide guidance and advice to expectant and new parents of multiples. I also started working on a voluntary basis with Multiple Births Canada on the Preterm Birth Support Network, which is a brand new network and I am working with a wonderful woman who has 30 years' experience working with expectant parents and parents of multiples (having multiples herself.) We are currently developing the "PBSN" and we look forward to working with parents of preterm multiples across Canada. This is an exciting venture, which will kick into full gear in 2013. My actual paid, full time work, has also been very exciting throughout 2012 and I look forward to my gaining even more knowledge and experience with my online work with clients and through social media.<br />
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Finally, here is a little list of my Top 10 Things to be Thankful for in 2012...<br />
1. My kids<br />
2. Family/Friends<br />
3. Health and progressive development<br />
4. Our employment<br />
5. Our house over our heads<br />
6. Our daycare provider<br />
7. Our support network-specialists, therapists and anyone who has helped us along the way<br />
8. My local Parents of Multiple Births Association and the friends I've made there<br />
9. Multiple Births Canada<br />
10.New opportunities<br />
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Best wishes to everyone in 2013! May it be all you hope and dream.Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-86093499366002132072012-11-19T20:50:00.001-05:002012-11-19T21:24:37.264-05:00Ribbon Decisions...A great question came up today on The Linden Fund's Facebook page, which I have questioned as well, and I know many others have too.<br />
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Where did this purple ribbon for "prematurity awareness" pop up from all of a sudden? Where did the pink and blue concept go? Why is one agency using purple and others pink and blue? In case it's not obvious, we premature parents focus on the little things as soon as our little premature children hit the scene. Little things matter.<br />
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If you look around the world at all the prematurity awareness agencies and campaigns-you will mostly see the colours pink and blue. Then this year purple appeared in a wave as each country went into the dark hours of the night on November 17. Purple in Toronto, Purple in Niagara Falls, Purple in NYC, Purple in Disneyland! Purple throughout South America, Istanbul, Italy, Ireland, Australia...you name it, many chose to get in on the display of purple during the <strong>Global Alliance to Prevent Prematurity and Stillbirth</strong> <span style="font-size: small;"><a href="http://www.who.int/pmnch/media/news/2012/201200404_premature_birth/en/index.html" target="_blank">Global Illumination Initiative</a>. Did you know that's what it was called? </span>Purple was present last year for World Prematurity Day as well, but on a much quieter level.<br />
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How is it possible the choice of purple swept over the world? Excellent marketing management, I would say. <em>Strong outreach</em> and <em>communication across the world</em> with other partners, such as those in the Global Alliance, working hard to decrease birth defects, preterm labour and delivery, and infant mortality. March of Dimes does this. After what I would call a simple "re-brand", they started using the purple ribbon in recent years after many years using the pink and blue as their preference for birth defect and prematurity awareness.<br />
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If you look at the March of Dimes' website, the ribbon pin for sale is called "<a href="http://www.awarenessproductsonline.com/product_mod_MODPin" target="_blank">March of Dimes Awareness Pin</a>," not the "prematurity awareness pin." <Click the link for a pic. March of Dimes focuses on the health and well-being of the mother during prenatal care, as well as the health of premature and term infants. I'd say their purple ribbon encompasses the overall health and wellness of mothers and babies--not just based on prematurity alone.<br />
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Other prematurity support agencies use purple, green, pink or blue, or blue and gold in their own specifically designed Prematurity Awareness pins or materials. I kind of like that many countries take on their own unique style and prefence when choosing their awareness pins.<br />
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As we are well aware, <a href="http://www.marchofdimes.com/" target="_blank">March of Dimes</a> in the United States has a preference for purple.<br />
<a href="http://www.littlebigsouls.com/" target="_blank">Little Big Souls in Africa</a> prefers purple for wrist bands and blue, gold and white for other awareness items.<br />
<a href="http://www.efcni.org/" target="_blank">European Foundation for the Care of Newborn Infants</a> (EFCNI) likes purple.<br />
<a href="http://www.prembaby.org.au/" target="_blank">National Premmie Foundation of Australia</a> has gone with purple and green.<br />
<a href="http://www.irishprematurebabies.com/" target="_blank">Irish Premature Babies</a> uses pink, blue and white.<br />
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Now, I am writing from Canada...just outside Toronto. On Saturday night I went down to Toronto to see our beautiful CN Tower lit up in purple. In Canada there is no one, strong and well-funded <strong>formal</strong> organization that works with those impacted by preterm birth or the aftercare of preterm babies. We have <a href="http://www.thelindenfund.com/" target="_blank">The Linden Fund</a>, which I refer to often (and I LOVE), but they are no March of Dimes or larger organization. Sadly, I didn't hear a peep out of our media until after all of Toronto wondered why the CN Tower turned purple on Sunday night. As I walked through downtown Toronto, I heard several people wonder aloud, "why is it purple tonight?" There was a little bit of news leading up to it, apparently, but not much. This fact is seriously disappointing to me. In a country this size, with this many people and a serious need for population replacement, nobody seemed to know about the importance of Saturday, November 17--aka World Prematurity Day.<br />
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Then this month, leading up to World Prematurity Day 2012, a new organization arrived on the Canadian scene. <a href="http://www.cpbf-fbpc.org/index.php" target="_blank">The Canadian Premature Babies Foundation.</a> The founder is also a mother of twins, born at 27 weeks. I can only assume she also found it very hard to get the right type of support and guidance during her preterm experience with her multiples. We do live in Canada, known for its amazing healthcare and universal benefits, but we lack in the area of prematurity awareness and support...according to me. Perhaps this is why we are undecided on colours for awareness purposes. We are thousdands of parents, working hard to find the answers, connect with the right people and best services we can find for our preterm infants and young children, which we often do alone. Many preterm families are slipping through the cracks and I hope this new Foundation, in partnership with The Linden Fund and a Quebec organization called Prema-Quebec can build a stronger network for preterm families and those who provide lifesaving services to them (hospitals, medical staff, and additional support agencies.) </div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-y70f5TNCJkY/UKrhiHdI66I/AAAAAAAAATU/pXyiUtPRJXA/s1600/preemieribbon.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" rea="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-y70f5TNCJkY/UKrhiHdI66I/AAAAAAAAATU/pXyiUtPRJXA/s320/preemieribbon.png" width="179" /></a>Now back to the awareness ribbon that got me started on this topic...Perhaps once we build a stronger preterm network of parents and medical professionals, we can choose our awareness or cause colours...but in the meantime, <em>I suggest<strong> pink</strong> and <strong>blue</strong> with two small <strong>purple </strong>butterflies on the lower ends of the ribbon</em>. Why butterflies and not baby footprints? The butterfly in many cultures across the world represents the "soul." The butterfly was described as, <a href="http://www.whats-your-sign.com/butterfly-animal-symbolism.html" target="_blank">"It’s connection with the soul is rather fitting. We are all on a long journey of the soul. On this journey we encounter endless turns, shifts, and conditions that cause us to morph into ever-finer beings. At our soul-journey’s end we are <b>inevitably changed</b> – not at all the same as when we started on the path."</a> This is a perfect description for how a mother and father are impacted right to the core--the soul--when they face the uncertainty of having a preterm infant, the ups and downs in a NICU, the baby's strength and ability to often pull through. This is why I feel the butterfly <em>belongs</em> on a Canadian prematurity awareness ribbon. </div>
<br />Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-13223215427170638632012-11-18T00:19:00.001-05:002012-11-18T00:21:34.474-05:00Preemie Power Tower! World Prematurity Day 2012<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>So I heard a few days ago that the CN Tower in Toronto would be lighting up purple in honour of World Prematurity Day and I got all excited at the prospect of seeing it myself. How could I justify a trip down the highway-about a 45-50 minute drive away on a good day-to see a Tower I'd seen thousands of times before.<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>Think, think, think.<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>My mother pointed out this week, that once I set my mind to something, I usually make it happen. So I thought and thought...and began looking into a reason I could take the trip. Luckily, a pretty special event was happening downtown, which I've never actually seen. The Cavalcade of Lights. The Christmas tree and city hall area being lit up with lights for the coming holiday season. Perfect! A night of nothing but looking at pretty lights.<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>Date night for Proud Preemie Mom and Dad! That never happens!<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>Off we went down the 401 to see a tower I grew up 20 minutes away from. A tower I've seen thousands of times. Yet I've never seen this thing purple! The fun part of tonight was my husband had absolutely no idea what I was up to (because he would have thought I was a little looney,) so heading down the highway he's guessing and guessing. Finally it occurred to him I'd slapped a purple ribbon on his jacket just before we headed out, I was wearing one, as well as a purple shirt and scarf. By George, I think he's got it.<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>So we wound up having a nice date night out on the town. Took pictures at the CN Tower like only tourists do. Had an awesome dinner. Then saw the lights festival. A special evening wrapped up a special day.<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: #674ea7;"><strong>Earlier in the day I did my share of tweeting and Facebook posting to spread the word about World Prematurity Day. I stuck a camera in my 3 preemies' faces more than they approved of and earlier today I still wasn't 100% sure I was going to get to Toronto, so I asked anyone that may be in the area to take a picture for me. Thankfully I got some of my own and here are a few.<o:p></o:p></strong></span><br />
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<strong><span style="color: purple; font-size: x-large;">HAPPY WORLD PREMATURITY DAY 2012</span></strong>Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-8426315215968929362012-11-15T20:43:00.003-05:002012-11-15T20:47:49.245-05:00November's such a busy month!With <strong>International Multiple Birth Awareness Week</strong> last week, <strong><span style="color: red;">Remembrance Day</span></strong>, the overall month of November being "<strong>Movember</strong>" raising awareness for men's physical and mental health and then coming up this Saturday, being <strong><span style="color: #674ea7;">World Prematurity Day</span></strong>...it's hard to choose one topic to focus on. So I didn't!<br />
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For this house, multiple birth awareness week is <em>every</em> week of the year! Our twins are just two and still look so similar that it's a common occurence to talk to people about their twinness, their birth experience, their NICU experience, their current status of development and everything else related to the twin life. The fact that I have taken on two recent formal roles to raise awareness and help families of multiples and families of preterm birth multiples only adds to the fact that I pretty much live and breathe "multiples."<br />
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For those that aren't in the know I have taken on a role to work as a peer health worker for my local POMBA. The role officially kicks in January 2012, but I'm taking some heavy duty training for certification, on top of my full time job and full time mommy duties. It's been exhausting, but a very rewarding and exciting time! In addition to that I am now co-chairing the <a href="http://www.multiplebirthscanada.org/" target="_blank">Multiple Births Canada</a> <strong>Preterm Birth Support Network (PBSN</strong>,) which is brand spanking new and being developed right from scratch. As a mom of preterm children-my tiny singleton and my teeny tiny twins-I know how challenging it was to get the right kind of support for my family in the early days and even after we all came home together. It was a lot of late nights up researching at my computer, looking for answers and guidance. With determination and many cups of coffee and tea, I did find leads to great things for our twins beyond the standard referrals to occupational therapy, speech and physio. There are many services and agencies available to provide support if you know where to look...which I know from talking to moms and dads, we don't know where to look. We don't necessarily know the questions to ask. I credit my background in social services and research for finding things, but had I been able to refer quickly to one source of support and get the information right away, we would have saved a lot of time. The fact I had 3 little boys to manage during the day meant my research really could only be done when everyone was fast asleep. So we hope the MBC Preterm Birth Support Network will be the go to for Canadian parents of preterm multiples for support, guidance, advice and referrals. So if you are Canadian and are preterm multiples parents or know of a family that is in need of support or even just needs a few questions answered, please refer them to Multiple Births Canada's website, linked above. There are many great benefits to becoming a member of Multiple Births Canada, the PBSN being just one of them.<br />
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Now on to Movember. I live in a house with 4 males, thus Movember is definitely important to me! So here are my 3 sons saluting this important month of awareness for men's health...<br />
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This past sunny, unusually warm Sunday, November 11, we made our way to one of the local cenotaphs to remember those who have fought to keep Canada strong and free, including a certain great-grandpa and great-great-uncle. Their WWII stories will continue to be passed on from generation to generation.</div>
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So it's been a very busy month and it's only half over! </div>
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And coming up in 2 more days this page will turn purple...</div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-24242508894120661892012-10-04T21:11:00.002-04:002012-10-30T22:10:06.414-04:00We give thanks<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">
This weekend is Thanksgiving and I'm looking forward to being able to spend time with my family and some great friends to give thanks.</div>
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We have had so much to be thankful for over the past several years--family, friends--strangers. Some of the greatest and life altering friendships came to us through new relationships formed with complete strangers. We are so thankful for the NICU staff of 3 different hospitals, the specialists we see throughout the month and new friends found through a common bond. </div>
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We will also be forever thankful to Ronald McDonald House Hamilton and all the support they provided our family. If you wonder if I will ever stop blogging on the topic of the Ronald McDonald House--that's highly unlikely! At this moment in time, the best way I know to show my thanks to them is to vote on a daily basis to help them receive an awesome award, giving them the opportunity to put another addition onto their new building--a smaller scale addition, but an "addition" nonetheless. </div>
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striving for a win in the AVIVA Community Fund competition and their Idea is to build a beautiful new garden for the future families of the House. Their Idea is specifically called "The Serenity Garden Project: Ronald McDonald House Hamilton." So this week I have been voting my little "Vote Now" button off. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-UeAQYStFTyE/UG4qvZgLAxI/AAAAAAAAAQQ/6s6jvZKDdKU/s1600/garden+camden.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; height: 139px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; width: 234px;"><img border="0" height="132" mea="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-UeAQYStFTyE/UG4qvZgLAxI/AAAAAAAAAQQ/6s6jvZKDdKU/s200/garden+camden.jpg" width="200" /></a>This is a quick and to the point blog post today. One more thing I'd be very thankful for is any votes, you, my readers are able to send their way! You can find their Idea page right here: <a href="http://www.avivacommunityfund.org/ideas/acf13689" target="_blank">The Serenity Garden Project</a></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: x-small;"><strong>"The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all." </strong></span></div>
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<strong><span style="color: purple; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: x-small;">The Emperor (Mulan movie)</span></strong></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Thank You!</strong></span></div>
Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-30120823497468963122012-09-05T22:16:00.001-04:002012-09-05T22:16:12.314-04:00Preemie # 1 Goes to Kindergarten!The time has come for our oldest preemie to start school. A usual milestone for many, but not always an "easy" one for children who were born premature. Thankfully, we have watched our firstborn preemie achieve and master each milestone right on time and sometimes ahead of the game. It is a relief to feel that all things are "okay." <br />
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There will be things to watch out for and pay attention to as he starts formal schooling and hopefully all will go well. One of the many, many standard questions asked in the paperwork we had to fill in for our son's school was in the health section..."Birth complications?" Why, yes. Yes, there were. "Birth complications" lands on the #1 slot in the long "yes or no" list. And there is a reason...<br />
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I don't plan to dwell on the "what if's," but I do plan on being well-informed and helping others keep informed. Children who are born premature often go through traumatic experiences right out the gate. Their brains are still forming when they arrive early, which leaves the baby without defence mechanisms or an understanding of what they are experiencing and feeling. Many premature babies can go through 60 procedures or more in the very early days following their arrival. That is a lot for an adult to take, let alone an undeveloped little baby. The following excerpt from an article entitled, <em><u>Recognizing the Potential Effect of Stress and Trauma on Premature Infants in the NICU: How Outcomes are <span class="GramE">Affected</span>?, </u></em>discusses the potential long term impact on premature infants. This article was published in the<em> <o:p></o:p></em><span class="GramE"><em>Journal of Perinatology, Dec, 2003, 23:679-683.</em> (The full article can be found <a href="http://www.premature-infant.com/Stress-and-Trauma.html" target="_blank">here.</a>)</span><br />
"When discussing an infant’s or child’s response to trauma, Perry et <span class="GramE">al(</span>10) explains, “in the developing brain, these states [temporary responses] organize neural systems, resulting in traits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because the brain changes in a use-dependent fashion and organized during development in response to experience, the specific pattern of neuronal activation associated with the acute responses to trauma are those which are likely to be internalized.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The human brain exists in its mature form only as a byproduct of genetic potential and environmental history”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Streech-Fischer and van der <span class="GramE">Kolk(</span>13) believe that “chronic childhood trauma interferes with the capacity to integrate sensory, emotional and cognitive information into a cohesive whole and sets the stage for unfocused and irrelevant responses to subsequent stress.”<br />
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Theoretically, as a premature infant grows, he/she may not be able to distinguish, on a subconscious or conscious level, between the here and now of a stressful event and the past events of the NICU due to the atypical development of his/her brain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In addition, if a premature infant’s brain is programmed to respond to constant stress, subsequently as he grows older, he may have a difficult time sorting out how to respond normally to everyday circumstances.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is important for us to abandon the myth that infants and children can “get over it because they didn’t even know what was happening.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dr. Perry, et al (10) believes that “children are not resilient, children are malleable.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We must recognize the potential effect from the difficult events in the lives of premature infants and children."<br />
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This information may be a lot to absorb, especially when we constantly hear "kids are resilient." Sure, they can be, but we have to let them be real too. Just because we want them to be resilient, doesn't mean they can or should be. They don't even know the meaning of the word!<br />
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I think the bottom line is for teachers, parents, family and friends to be aware of some of the potential realities premature children may face, not to immediately label kids and to seek proper support and guidance from infant and child developmental programs and specialists if and when needed. Thankfully we live in a country with these options and supports in place. I am always grateful for this!<br />
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To our amazing little future graduate of the Class of 2027, we're ready to help you and watch you learn and grow during this great adventure!Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-67366827337267810762012-07-09T22:51:00.000-04:002012-07-09T23:10:16.686-04:00Mommy Brain MomentsAs moms, I think we all suffer from "mommy brain" every now and then or maybe you call it "momnesia." The moments where we're doing something and in the midst of whatever it is, we forget what we were trying to do. Why is this jar of baby food in my hand again?? The moments where we walk the house looking in every nook and cranny and couch crevice, just trying to find the elusive TV remote control...only to find it a few hours later in the fridge with the baby bottles. Sometimes we lack the ability to multi-task because we're feeling exhausted and put things in the most random and ridiculous places. Sometimes we re-wash our hair because we can't remember if we just did a second ago! Little silly things. It's a lot of work looking after two babies at one time...nursing them, feeding them, making sure they don't fall off couches or change tables and so on! It's a lot to pay attention to and keep focused on, especially when you're awake every two hours during the nights.<br />
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You begin to dream of changing diapers, feeding babies and washing bottles...because that is the daily routine. Over and over and over again! You begin to dream of sleep in your sleep.<br />
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You do other silly, random...shh don't tell anyone I did that...things...such aaaaas...<br />
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You get the motivation to go out to the lovely outdoor market without another adult for backup support. The market will be packed, yet you have high hopes your gigantic double stroller will either easily clear a path or people will be helpful and hold the doors or not swarm in droves around your stroller to get by you quickly. You'll hope you'll be able to manoeuvre your double stroller into the family washroom space, without the door knob getting stuck on your clothing or diaper bag as you rifle inward. Squeek, Squish, Squuuueeeeze in! Or not...After realising the market idea was a major task to take on, you begin moving quickly to pick up a few things to make it worth while and walk back to the van...all you want to do is get everyone packed back in the van and jet out of there...FAST! Mama needs a coffee! By now, you are probably pretty tired. Parked on the side of the road, you just want to get the kids in the car safely and move on and get home soon. As you pull away, drive down the street and come to the stop sign, do a right and begin driving away...you have a sinking feeling you've forgotten something. But what could it be?? Sinking feeling...Look in rearview...Make sure nothing has come flying off the roof of the van and landed on the road behind us. Nothing. Sinking feeling. Pull over and slam the van in park...Really bad sinking feeling. Jump out of the van and run to the back and yank open the gate. No double stroller!!?? Oh. My. Gawd! Where was I parked, which little side road?? I can't remember! The fact you are seriously lacking sleep leaves you feeling completely unsure of your answer and you jump back in the van and drive quickly back toward where you think you were parked...yet you're really not sure...so you begin slowly creeping along streets, peering down each upcoming intersection...There it is! The stroller, standing all alone, right where you left it on the side of the road! You "discreetly" pull up, keep your head down and jump out of the van and hope no nosey neighbours are watching from their windows laughing their heads off at your dumb momnesia moment and get that big honking stroller in the back as fast as possible...which really will never be a fast task.</div>
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You sheepishly drive away, laughing at how dumb a move that was!</div>
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Another good stroller episode I had was, yet again because I had just experienced a long day, this time at the hospital. Rounds of appointments, lots of waiting and lots of conversation, Q&A's and so forth. Finally time to roll out, take the elevator down, answer lots of peoples' questions about twins along the way. Get the kids packed in, get in the driver's seat. Have to back up this time because of the spot we're parked in. What's that mild crunching noise I hear?? Oooooh yeah! Forgot the stroller again and this time I just thought I should attempt to do some Side Impact Testing on it by backing up. Eeesh! Now I'm probably laughing an insane cackle as I put the stroller away and again hope no one is laughing their heads off at me.</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tAq1duIzFV4/T_uXvb5eaZI/AAAAAAAAAO0/NOgdEdrP79M/s1600/coffee+face.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" sca="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tAq1duIzFV4/T_uXvb5eaZI/AAAAAAAAAO0/NOgdEdrP79M/s1600/coffee+face.jpg" /></a>You go through the drive thru one morning to get the "usual" coffee and bagel. Chattering away to the babies and looking in the rearview mirror at them as you wait your turn to order. Keep chattering away, pull up to the window and you find the customer service rep staring at you blankly. You blankly stare back. Then it suddenly dawns on you that you completely drove by the order speaker and pulled up to the window without actually placing an order. Duh. Mommy Brain. </div>
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When your husband comes home and asks how your day was, you respond, "Absolutely fantabulous, of course!"</div>
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I have many of these silly moments. And if you're a mom, I'm sure you do too! I've got more and I'll share them another time, but not this time because I'm tired.</div>Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-55957112659125100902012-06-24T22:46:00.001-04:002012-06-24T22:54:03.685-04:00Two Years<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">
Two years ago at this time (9:45 PM) my family and I were packing it in early, heading up to our room at the Ronald McDonald House Hamilton for the night. This time it wasn't just my husband, young son and I going up to our room. This time it was my mother, mother-in-law and father-in-law, all packing ourselves into our room with cots and a pull out couch to accomodate all of us. Thankfully, the House really was able to accomodate this stretch on the usual number of occupants of our room. The House had cots, pillows and blankets stored for times like these. We were preparing to meet Twin B at 7:00 AM on June 25, just before they wheeled him into surgery to have a ventricular reservoir inserted to help relieve the pressure of fluid on the brain due to Hydrocephalus. By this time the baby had grown enough and was stable enough to help relieve the pressure by this surgical procedure. To say we were "scared" does not describe it well enough, yet I can't actually put the feelings into words. They were feelings and they were strong!</div>
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The next morning my brother and father met up with us as we headed into the hospital as a strong family, going in to be strong for our little Twin B. It was a bright, sunny and warm day. So much to be positive about--instilling confidence in me that this day would turn out well. </div>
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After only a couple of hours the reservoir had been inserted and the baby came out of surgery awake and alert, which the doctor advised prior to going in would not be the case. This was another positive for the day, making me feel our baby would be okay.</div>
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There was our little man up in the NICU, back in an isolette to avoid infection, and to recuperate and grow strong again. By this time, Twin B, was perhaps 4 pounds, give or take. So small to be going through so much!<br />
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This surgery was the first of two to deal with his Hydrocephalus. Ironically, the month of June is Hydrocephalus Awareness Month in my province of Ontario. This is yet another sign to me, that this baby was put on this Earth to help us raise awareness for various causes and conditions, which children and adults face each day. Hydrocephalus is generally a lifelong condition, which requires regular monitoring and awareness individuals with this condition. Here is a great explanation of Hydrocephalus, which is outlined on the <a href="http://www.sbhao.on.ca/hydrocephalus" target="_blank">Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus Association of Ontario</a> website. There are more people walking around with this condition than you may be aware of, so it's something to consider and understand if you can. </div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_02FhP5dq0g/T-fNZiozkpI/AAAAAAAAAOM/qWK5zzo5tGQ/s1600/June+2012+212.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" rca="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_02FhP5dq0g/T-fNZiozkpI/AAAAAAAAAOM/qWK5zzo5tGQ/s320/June+2012+212.jpg" width="320" /></a>Additionally, today marks another milestone. After about 18 months the Ronald McDonald House Hamilton, where we stayed for over 3 months, had their Grand Opening following a very large addition to the existing House. Today we got to visit the House and take a walk down memory lane and see all the amazing changes they made. I was inspiring to see how so many people could come together, create a new design, blend the old with the new and be so creative while doing it! They talked to parents of families from the past, talked to experts and those that could give some insight on what things would make the house operate most efficiently for all types of needs.</div>
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Some of the great new ideas they implemented include:</div>
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<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><em>A room for new mothers to pump or have some time to themselves.</em></li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><em>A fridge in each room (previously there were communal fridges on each floor, which wasn't always ideal for mothers.)</em></li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><em>Various quiet nooks or niches throughout the building, for family quiet time and spaces to gather away from open areas for some privacy.</em></li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-lGMp-47PSNg/T-fNuPWCKDI/AAAAAAAAAOg/W1ptPdFqKVw/s1600/June+2012+303.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" rca="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-lGMp-47PSNg/T-fNuPWCKDI/AAAAAAAAAOg/W1ptPdFqKVw/s320/June+2012+303.jpg" width="320" /></a><em>A library-reading room, which was gorgeous! Our oldest son didn't want to leave the room today.</em></li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><em>A playroom right off the eat in kitchen area, closed in by windows and visible from the kitchen area, so kids can play while family eats.</em></li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><em>Hotelling rooms--Similar to Care-By-Parent rooms you might find in a NICU area or other parts of the hospital wards, but larger, more welcoming and spacious. Families staying at the hospital can potentially be referred over to use the room for a night or two. This would definitely be great for tired parents, who want to be close to their child and just need a quick refresher and a night away from the hospital room recliner.</em></li>
<li><em>A large culinary kitchen.</em></li>
<li><em>Last, but definitely not least, an amazing secret room for children to visit.</em></li>
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I could go on and on, but I won't. It is safe to say the families that must visit the Ronald McDonald House Hamilton will feel very much welcomed and as though their specific family dynamic and needs were well-planned for...because they were. I get the feeling the staff of the House left no stone unturned when it came to planning and researching the needs of families and understanding each family is different in order to ensure they can accomodate pretty much anyone that walks through their new front door.</div>
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So, congrats to Ronald McDonald House Hamilton for such an amazing and inspiring job you did on this new "home away from home." We loved it and the families of the future will too!</div>
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Thank you to those that helped support my family while fundraising for this amazing cause over the past two years!</div>
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<br /></div>Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-54303601919569938502012-06-04T22:20:00.000-04:002012-06-04T22:22:09.506-04:00Help me...Help You!I don't know why, but for a couple of weeks I have been walking around with this silly phrase popping into my mind, which is a line from an old movie, Jerry Maguire. "Help me...help you!" Up until now, I have had no idea why it has been floating around in my mind...and now I do!<br />
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I'm just back from sitting in on an Expectant Parents of Multiples meeting. The peer health workers that facilitated the meeting were discussing the many things to think about and plan for when expecting twins and how to handle things after they arrive. They talked about things like labour and delivery, epidurals and c-sections, the possibility of a NICU stay and possible pre-term births. We also got talking about what to expect after you arrive home with your bundles of joy. Some of the ladies were expecting triplets! Yeehaw!! Even as a mother of multiples (twins) the prospect of triplets does bug my eyes out a bit, I have to admit! Especially if those parents already have one or more children. You know what though? Where there's a will, there's a way. The importance of having a support network is huge when having multiples, in order to help you get through a challenging time like a NICU stay to bringing home babies and getting into a routine in your own home. <br />
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The following is a list of things that made me smile, which you might not think about when expecting babies. Friends, families and spouses might not even think of some of these small things, which can really put a smile on an exhausted mom's face.<br />
<ul>
<li>A hot cup of coffee or tea (decaf if mom's nursing) arriving without request just one random afternoon.</li>
<li>A neighbour or husband clearing off your car after a snowfall (especially on mornings when there may be important appointments for the babies.)</li>
<li>A mom or mother-in-law coming in and quietly caring for the babies and older siblings while mommy takes a quick nap or a shower.</li>
<li>A friend preparing trays of lasagnas and other meals that can go into the freezer and wait to be eaten.</li>
<li>A gift certificate for a housekeeping service to come and wash the floors and help sanitize the place, which mom feels she will never have time to get to.</li>
<li>A friend or family member coming over to watch an older child while mom gets a chance to do some one-to-one or one-to-two bonding, which can be hard with an older child who deserves just as much attention.</li>
<li>A friend or family member coming in and cleaning the piles and piles of baby bottles and other dishes.</li>
<li>Letting mom get a sleep in morning, which is so rare!</li>
</ul>
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The list could go on and will be different for many, but a lot of these examples I think are pretty universal. All we have to do is ask. Or when someone asks, what can I help you with or what do you need, don't be ashamed to ask, as most people are going to be more than willing to jump right in to help you with pretty much anything.<br />
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So, the point I am trying to make is, in order for anyone to be able to understand what you need and how to help you, you have to help them understand how to help you, simply by instructing or asking and letting go of some of the need to be Super Mommy and to do all!Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-9638553184955695372012-05-29T22:14:00.000-04:002012-05-29T22:14:53.316-04:00May ManiaMay is just about on its way out and I'm exhausted! May is a month I had aimed to try to not have children. Seriously. With family birthdays in March, April, May + Mother's Day, June - an anniversary + Father's Day, I saw July as being the best spot to try to have children, plus my husband and I liked the idea of having fun summertime birthday parties, like the ones I grew up with.<br />
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Instead, we had three babies due in July, who chose to show up as a our Spring Chicks in May. So we work with what we are given, right? Three little boys' birthdays within 10 days of each other. Talk about exhausting! One happens to land the weekend of Mother's Day and a party is usually thrown that Saturday. This year, thankfully, we went a little smaller scale for the twins' birthday. We made up for it 10 days later with 16 kids ages four and under, running around a hot, stuffy room with paint brushes as weapons in their hands. This year's theme was Super Heroes, which seemed fitting, considering we think we've got some pretty Super Preemies, who battled so many odds and have come out of it spectacularly well. We had the kids in a Batman, Superman and tried a Spiderman shirt for the Big Brother, but he wasn't having it that day! Of course! The shirt was purchased specifically for this day and he pulls Big 4-Year Old Attitude! Wow! <br />
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This month we also helped with the Ronald McDonald House fundraising again and for fun, I threw in running a garage sale. One thing I do continue to wonder is, where does all this STUFF come from? I even ask for donations or to pull back from excess shopping for birthday parties, yet, we have all of this STUFF...<br />
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Thoughts of piles of junk throughout my house aside, we've had a wonderful month with lots of nature walks and hanging out in the amazing sunshine, which we miss so much here in Canada during the winter months. We've been making up for lost time! We were able to get out to a picnic for Canada's National Multiple Births Awareness Day this past Sunday for with our Chapter of the Parents of Multiple Births Association.<br />
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So between all of this and my trying to plan and master part of my new job description, which is involving planning and developing of online blog, website and other social media content, my brain has been in overdrive...hence the lack of blog posts this month. <br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xc3Wl_nuc7A/T8V__wijppI/AAAAAAAAANw/9qDH6ymaIzo/s1600/IMG_0267.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" rba="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xc3Wl_nuc7A/T8V__wijppI/AAAAAAAAANw/9qDH6ymaIzo/s320/IMG_0267.JPG" width="179" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Just some of the STUFF occupying my home!<br />
Does it ever end??</td></tr>
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Now coming up for the month of June is Spina Bifida & Hydrocephalus Awareness Month, here in Ontario. I will help raise awareness and will certainly have a post coming up on the topic. Bring on June! I am ready!Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7492331356202777568.post-70169434169342155752012-05-02T16:37:00.000-04:002012-05-02T16:37:57.418-04:00Imagine...McHappy Day 2012<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Imagine…expecting your first child to arrive in 9 weeks; the excitement and anticipation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Imagine…unexpectedly and without warning, delivering your baby 9 weeks too soon; the fear and heartache.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Imagine…your first mother’s day, a child only seven minutes old, and fighting to survive. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A mother and father able to do nothing but hope, watch, and wait.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Imagine…less than two years later; expecting twins—anticipation high and the idea of premature delivery in the back of everyone’s minds. Imagine…the same thing unfolding, only 13 weeks too soon and with even more on the line: The health and well-being of not one, but two small babies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Another mother’s day comes and goes and you still have yet to hold either child—too unwell and fragile to be out of their isolettes.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Now imagine having to watch your babies being transported by ambulance to a Level III NICU, outside your hometown and away from all that you know, including your family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your new home is a NICU.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Suddenly you are surrounded by the uncomfortable sounds of quiet, repetitive beeps of machines, the slow and then the fast paced alarms of dozens of premature babies in their isolettes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is a whole new world you must quickly adapt to and try to get used to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even if you’ve already been through the experience once, it’s never an experience you will be one hundred percent used to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You now must rely on the knowledge and expertise of medical professionals, putting much of the care of your babies in their hands in the very early days.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Imagine the isolation a mother and father can face in this situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Feeling “alone” in place filled with people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lacking their own support network and feeling no one can really understand if they haven’t experienced this situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now imagine having the option to have a place to go to and call your “home away from home,” whether for a short period of time or for several months. A home built to suit the needs of many families and differing dynamics.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A home that is comfortable, inviting and clean.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The kind of home in which one can go back to for a fresh cooked dinner, without the worry of dealing with cooking it and occupying important time that would be better spent in the NICU. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A home in which other people are going through similar experiences and are able to build a connection with others for moral support.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is a place like this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is called Ronald McDonald House.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Ronald McDonald House strives to provide a positive and comfortable place for families with un-well children living in a hospital.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thankfully, our area is fortunate to have access to a House in Hamilton, London (SWO) and Toronto—three of the common sites for the children of our region to receive lifesaving, acute and long-term healthcare.</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0D5zwjWL1BE/T6GVbDJzGtI/AAAAAAAAAMc/aQ-OXiIavSg/s1600/Mary+Jane+Summer+2010+552.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" mea="true" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0D5zwjWL1BE/T6GVbDJzGtI/AAAAAAAAAMc/aQ-OXiIavSg/s200/Mary+Jane+Summer+2010+552.jpg" width="200" /></a><span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">These Houses would not be able to run without donor support.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For $25.00 a family can eat breakfast before starting their day at the hospital.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It takes $100.00 to keep a bathroom stocked for one month.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A little bit can go a long way in a house that is always up and running 24 hours a day for families in need.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It takes over 1000 volunteers across Canada to help keep the homes in tip top shape and to carry out various daily activities and special events.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A lot of effort is put into having a “home away from home” for families in need.</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DLdljGq7qlY/T6GVo8XSwTI/AAAAAAAAAMk/3bE9XjWB9BA/s1600/Twins+041.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" mea="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DLdljGq7qlY/T6GVo8XSwTI/AAAAAAAAAMk/3bE9XjWB9BA/s200/Twins+041.jpg" width="200" /></a><span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As my family marks the second and fourth birthdays of our premature children, we also mark McHappy Day, along with another Mother’s Day quickly approaching.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This coming Wednesday, May 2, is McHappy Day at all McDonald’s Restaurants.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My family will be assisting with raising funds for this wonderful cause. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Funds raised in our region will be going to the Ronald McDonald House Hamilton and KidsAbility.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shortly after this event, Ronald McDonald House Hamilton will also be hosting the 3<sup>rd</sup> annual Footsteps for Families walk-a-thon to assist with raising funds for their newly renovated House.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After a major renovation the home will be increased from 15 to 40 rooms for families to stay.</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KyQ323SASIo/T6GWZyAF6QI/AAAAAAAAAM0/FQW6jgfpv1I/s1600/Twins+063.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" mea="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-KyQ323SASIo/T6GWZyAF6QI/AAAAAAAAAM0/FQW6jgfpv1I/s320/Twins+063.jpg" width="240" /></a><span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We have much to be grateful for and a lot of that is thanks to the wonderful people at the Ronald McDonald House Hamilton and the KidsAbility staff, whom we’ve come to know well.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Please “help our home grow” in Hamilton by visiting your local McDonald’s Restaurant or visiting my family’s Footsteps for Families fundraising page at </span><a href="http://my.e2rm.com/personalPage.aspx?SID=3291302&langPref=en-CA"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">http://my.e2rm.com/personalPage.aspx?SID=3291302&langPref=en-CA</span></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> or visit </span><a href="http://footstepsforfamilies.com/"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">http://footstepsforfamilies.com</span></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>or </span><a href="http://helpourhomegrow.ca/"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">http://helpourhomegrow.ca/</span></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> for more information. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This story also ran in the Cambridge Times newspaper on Tuesday, May 1, 2012, ironically the twins 2nd Birthday. <a href="http://www.cambridgetimes.ca/community/article/1345572--a-home-away-from-home">http://www.cambridgetimes.ca/community/article/1345572--a-home-away-from-home</a></span></div>
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<br /></div>Twintrospectiveshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04447741845948876752noreply@blogger.com0